Lunch today pretty much centered on LeBron James talk. I couldn’t have cared less. My only contribution to the conversation was the observation that he has a gnome beard.
This led to my mind wandering into a different direction.
What exactly would a gnome beard be in slang terms? Dating someone to mask the fact you are in fact a garden gnome? Would this happen in fantasy realms? Would say a gnome dating a fairy give off the appearance he’s really a dwarf?
Are gnomes considered asexual? I mean people in England are getting in trouble all the time for sexy garden gnomes. Then again, garden gnomes tend to be pretty old little sprites. It’s all white beards and sensible shoes. They probably would need gnome Viagra (Gniagra? The power of the falls in your pants?).
Fairies are always lying around like Playboy models on dew-covered flowers, but I don’t really imagine gnomes are getting it on in the tulips after midnight.
Then you have dwarfs who are like mini-Vikings, off mining various types of ores and beating the shit out of other mystical creatures with their big clubs. I think a dwarf would love to bang the bejeebus out of a fairy. So if a gnome were going to try and pass himself off as something other than gnome, hooking up with a fairy, dying his beard, and getting clunkier shoes to pass himself off as a dwarf would be a definite path in life.
Gnome beard. Random thought for the day.
That is the most interesting Lebron inspired thing I have read or heard all day!